Stupid Keys, Stupid Dog, Stupid Wings

At first I wasn’t sure, but now I KNOW I have definitely been having cravings! Cravings for really really spicy foods and then really sour foods. In fact, I couldn’t find anything around the house spicy enough to satisfy my taste buds. Not even the tapatillo on EVERYTHING was doing it’s usual trick. So I jammed on over to the new Buffalo Wild Wings for lunch with Sam and got the second hottest wings they serve, called ”wild,” to go. Sam had parmesan garlic wings.

We ate them on the way over to Jake’s school to enjoy the first grade “Celebrate America” program. I don’t have any kids in the first grade but I love to go because a large amount of kids under the age of 7 in the spotlight is just begging for some good entertainment. Public nose picking, outrageous outfits, funky hair. I love it.

Anyway, about halfway through the program my tummy starts to rumble and I feel sick. I’m pretty sure I’m not gonna upchuck quite yet but as I make my move to find an exit (just to be safe), my keys fall off my lap and down under the bleachers. We were sitting at the very top. Greeeeat. So I concentrate on breathing in through my nose and out through my mouth til the show is over. Sammy crawls under and snags the keys for me. Monkey children can be so useful.

We are on our way back out to the car when all the sudden Jake tells me he has to “go.” He has to go REALLY bad. Now, I don’t know if most of you know this but my first born takes an unusually long time to poo. It’s so bad that we try and plan our outings AROUND his poop schedule just so we don’t wind up standing in a public bathroom for half an hour. But I’m still feeling nauseous so I take a chance that he can hold it and zoom home.

But that puts me back in the car where the left over wings are and the desire to puke gets even stronger with the smell lingering. The second we get home I tell Jake just to run inside. In his haste though, he leaves the gate open and what happens? Da da da daaa da daaaaaa! Out runs Rincon!

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m glad that Rincon comes to me when I call, but at times like this it would be nice if he were more obedient to ANYONE else! In fact, it would be nice if he had enough brain cells to learn to just stay inside the fence, like Molly does. But, can’t teach an old dog new tricks and he’s already too far away to hear me so, back in the car I go!

I had just gotten enough fresh air in my lungs that the smell of wings hit me full force again and I almost lost it. Dry heaving all the way until I find Rincon and hop him inside the car.

I made it home just in time to spend the rest of the evening clinging to porcelain. Just in case you’re wondering, “wild” wings burn just as much coming back up as they do going down. Needless to say, my cravings for the spicy are COMPLETELY gone.

ps- Rincon just came to snuggle my cold feet while I type so I guess I have to forgive him.